Fuck The Snow

Mother nature can get down on her icy knees and blow me. I’m sick of all this snow. Here I thought the one good thing about getting kicked out of my house would be that I wouldn’t have to do so much shoveling. The place I’m at now has three steps and about 5ft of sidewalk. Not much until the plows decide to use the area for snow storage. I don’t know what it is, the way the road bends, the plow drivers hate me, or what but after each snow storm there is a medium scale model of Mount Washington preventing me from opening the door. So shovel I must.

I am going to test out snow bombs. I will tightly wrap black gunpowder with strapping tape (so shrapnel won’t be an issue). Then I will choose a big mound of snow, poke a hole in it and insert my bomb. I want to know how much gunpowder is needed to flatten mounds of various sizes. BOOM! No more shoveling. So if you are around my neighborhood during the next storm you will know why it sounds like Bagdad.