My Sore Foot

Oh my little droogies, here I am in bed with a very sore and swollen foot, a possible case of “arthritic sepsis” or something they tell me. But I am poppin’ the ole pills! Yessa! And as is usual with something like this, my pain and suffering will be your education/entertainment/salvation since I’m working up an inflamed blog just for you, my faithful worshippers! God, does life get any better?

I know you are just bursting at the seams wondering my take on the recent presidential elections. We are going to have a black dude as president! Actually, I couldn’t care less about what f’n color he is just so long as he isn’t the pallid grayish white of the current holder of the office. And let me go on record saying that the developmentally disabled dipshit that has been our president for almost 8 long, torturous (in more ways than one) years is the worst one ever. EVER! Boy, I’m going out on a limb with that one, huh?

Actually, I feel sorry for Mr. Obama. He is getting handed a real steaming pile of stinking shit to deal with. I don’t envy him at all. Good luck. Oh, and one other observation – Mrs. Obama will be the hottest first lady of all time, supplanting Jackie-O for the honor in my humble opinion. Little Wheelgun stands right at attention just thinking about it.

And speaking of those with vaginas, Sarah Palin just won’t go away. She is positioning herself (down, little Wheelgun, down!) to run for president in 4 years, assuming she knows that presidents serve for four years at a time. And the neocon-jobbers are lovin’ it since Sarah, just like Bush (the current president, not the pubic hair), is a dim incurious tabula rasa that they can attach their puppet strings to. And she is of course a fundamentalist Christian (gullible moron) which helps their cause as well. And there are a lot of Joe the fucking six-pack Nascar Walmart plumbers around to fall for it come election time.

Shit, my foot hurts! And what really sucks is that I had started going back to the gym (chicks take note) to start sculpting my Adonis like physique back to it’s studly self. Now I must lie in bed blobbing out until such time as I can walk, let alone pump massive iron. Maybe I will contact Jose Conseco and see if he can get me some of the juice so I can short-circuit the process somewhat. I hear he’s in Mexico looking for his lost manhood.

Now, I wonder who would win in an IQ contest between Jose, Sarah Palin and George Bush? Actually their combined IQs might make a sea-monkey a bit jealous.