Tuesday, August 23, 2005

This Is War!

Sorry about the lengthy periods between blogs recently, but I have been at war. No, I haven't been at war with the president of the United States as you might suspect since he is an enemy of decent Americans everywhere. And, no, this is not some abstract enemy like my weight. My enemy is a flesh and blood, wily and worthy adversary. He is also a squirrel.

Yes, it is the same damned furry little prick that has been testing my resolve for a while now. Last winter he was huge. He looked like a fur covered cantaloupe. A summer of nervously scampering half way across the road, stopping, turning around and scampering back only to do it again several more times before making it to the other side has seen him loose a lot of weight.

The beady-eyed bastard has no fear of me at all despite the fact that I am The Cod God's uncle. I can almost touch him before he will scurry off. Yesterday, he was feasting on some snacks I had in my back pack out on the breezeway. Unfortunately, one of my hippie roommates was there otherwise we would have had squirrel soup that night.

So I need a way of dispatching the rodential evil-doer or at least scaring the nuts off him without pissing off my animal loving roommates. Any suggestions?


At 12:49 AM, Blogger B-Face said...

Simply point out that squirrels aren't animals. They are Satan's minions.

That or shoot the damn thing while no one's home. Or if you don't want to take the blame, I know someone who recently got a hell of a varmint rifle......

At 4:05 PM, Blogger CptLeech said...

Kill the hippies first.

At 7:10 PM, Blogger Wheel Gun Bob said...

Always a good rule of thumb.

At 2:28 PM, Blogger The Cod God said...

I have a brand new .17 HMR that is desperately calling out to me to kill something with it.


At 2:29 PM, Blogger The Cod God said...

ps- judging by the 2500 fps it sports, I should be able to nail him from my house


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