Monday, August 01, 2005

Cheesy Rides And Bad Food

I'm bored out of my fucking sack. Which is actually a good place to be here at work. It means I'm in the eye of a shit storm and things are relatively calm for the moment. So I thought I might take a minute and entertain you people with another one of my witty and informative blogs. First, a couple of observations on the news of the day, etc. and then I will fill you in on my blog plans for the rest of the week.

NASA has been testing out ways to repair the space shuttle while it’s in orbit. I saw a show on Discovery about it a while back and the woman in charge of this repair program is a raging babe. I would love to spackle her tiles. Anyway, they are going to perform space walks to repair some minor damage done to the heat shield tiles. Then they might rotate the tires and replace the catalytic converter. Hope it works and they don't all come back crispy critters like the last time.

Went to the Stratham Fair with my roomies yesterday. Boy, I tell you, lotsa folks from the shallow end of the gene pool were on hand. Cheesy rides and bad food. Too expensive. But fun. Some day when I'm critically bored, I will tell you about my short career as a carny. But the funniest part of the day was the "pig scramble." This involved kids running around trying to catch a bunch of squealing piglets. Good thing PETA was nowhere to be seen. Maybe they showed up but were beaten to death by toothless goobers.

3,000 hit, 500 homerun ballplayer and Viagra pitchman Raffy Palmeiro just got caught using the juice. This was one of the guys who testified to Congress about steroid use in baseball and said he had never used the stuff. Hah! Fuck you, Raffy. You should have stuck to Viagra. Actually, he probably needed Viagra to get it up after the years of steroid abuse caused his dink to shrink. What a moron. You better hope you turn out like that fucker Ollie North who became a hero for lying to Congress. Have a nice 10 days off, you dipshit. Maybe Manny will get caught on purpose so he can have more days off.

One of my roommates found a cheap digital camera at a yard sale for 5 cents. So I think I will borrow it and take various pictures of "my life" and put them up on this blog as a special treat to you, my devoted fans. Being an IT fag, I have a very good digital camera myself but I'm not wasting it on this space. So be prepared, starting tomorrow, to see some photographic evidence of my pathetic existence. You may want to pop an Ambien or two to help you sleep tonight.


At 10:15 AM, Blogger The Cod God said...

nothing below the belt, please

I don't want to have to break out my camera and see which side of the family had the better "endowment"...and I ain't talking money, 'cause we're all broke

At 10:49 AM, Blogger Wheel Gun Bob said...

Nickle says its Bill


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