Monday, October 31, 2005

Happy Halloween Mutha Fuckas!

This is my favorite holiday of the year. I had a great time last night scaring the crap out of little kids coming to my door. I dressed up like a vampire with lots of blood coming out of my mouth and set up a fog machine in the front yard. "Mommy, that man scares me! Wa-a-a-ah!" What a riot! I almost ran out of candy, we had so many trick-or-treaters. It also didn't help that I ate as much as I gave out. Then me and my pal Tom pounded Bud pounders and watched football instead of having band practice. Great night.

I thought of a great costume for next year. I will make a toilet out of wood and cardboard. I will wear it so my upper body comes out of the seat. Then I will fashion a pair of fake legs and ass to sit on the pot with white, studded pants around the ankles. My real legs will go down to the ground through the toilet so I can walk around. I will then dress up like Elvis and wear blueish make-up so I look dead. It will be great. Maybe Little Dougie Porksword can help me with this project.


At 7:19 AM, Blogger jOhnny said...

...and then, you can give out Baby Ruth's to the little bastards in the neighborhood, pulled straight from the bowl.

At 10:38 PM, Anonymous Elvis said...

On that fateful day, there wasn't any Baby Ruth in my bowl. I was lucky, I came along when there was no treeeeuuund.

At 9:09 AM, Blogger The Cod God said...

I have my own natural fog bank that hovers around my house... it's called the stink of failure.

It just kind of hovers around me.

At 11:14 AM, Blogger LittleDougyPorkSword said...

That costume would be a breeze. How about deep fried peanut butter and banana sandwiches and shots of So Co. Also, realistic stench and a halo of flies would be good.

At 11:05 PM, Blogger B-Face said...

"Also, realistic stench and a halo of flies would be good."

Those are already firmly in place around the Wheel Gun. He's halfway to a successful costume without even trying.


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