Wednesday, July 06, 2005

Post Vacation Reds

Vacations are only good up to a point. And that point is the point at which the vacation ends. I came into work today after a few days off. Now keep in mind that when I get to work at 4:00PM it's usually like a scene out of ER except substitute computers for patients. And when the folks see me stroll in, it's their ticket home! "Bob can you do this, Bob can you do that, could you just finish this for me, So-and-so had a hard drive failure and needs it replaced and the data retrieved before he comes back from dinner and I have to go home to water my cat."

Well, I got in a little late today due to the amount of traffic still heading south after the 4th of July weekend. When I barged into my cube, I almost didn't notice the person sitting in my chair. Almost sat on his lap. I looked at him and said "Who the hell are you?" "I am being eentern" replied the pimply faced dweeb in a thick Russian or Eastern European accent. "Intern?" I snapped, "Interred will be more like it if you don't get out of my chair now!"

The poor jack-ass didn't know what to think judging from the stupid, slack-jawed expression on his pock-marked face. He got up to leave when I told him to sit down and relax. I spend the first part of my shift in the Network Operating Center anyway. "But please don't screw with my things, OK?" And I grabbed my Office 2003 reference book out of his hands. "And what is your name, intern?" He mumbled something that sounded like "Uri." God, he has bad breath. I tossed the book back to him and said "Welcome aboard, we can use the help."

Good. Now I have someone I can crap all over instead of the other way around. I just hope they don't put him on my shift for any training. That would suck. Why couldn't they get a cute chick intern?

I've just hunted down a label maker and I'm labeling all my shit.


At 7:57 AM, Blogger LittleDougyPorkSword said...

Maybe he has a really hot sister who is an ex KGB agent that wears spandex all the time, carries a gun, and knows fellati..uh..karate.

At 3:12 PM, Blogger Erin Nicole said...

i am laughing my ass off. as someone who works in science i know all about the non-english speaking rigors of day-to-day life. i have one chinese girl that i almost have to use sign language with. here's an e-mail from today that she sent:
"Would you have time check clones for me today or tomorrow? After checking, I will start order the animals." i mean, come on!!

At 3:23 PM, Blogger The Cod God said...

You're in charge of a Russkie? I don't know, Bob. Maybe we need to show him first hand the greatness that is American firepower firsthand....and then we'll shoot something out of his second hand.

I'm also persobally appauled that they would leave someone in your charge. You can't even control your bitches. They've been holding out on you for months and working for me on the side.

At 3:23 PM, Blogger The Cod God said...

Next thing you know, you'll be allowed to have kids and stuff.


Post a Comment

<< Home