Approach The Bench And Squat

I wish I was on the Senate Judiciary Committee so I could ask Supreme Court nominee Judge Roberts some questions. Here are a few I just thought up:

1. Do you drink?

2. As chief justice, would you wear that gay robe with the gold arm bands like Renquist did?

3. Would you ever go duck hunting with someone connected to a case that was to be argued in front of your court?

4. Would you stop any ballot recounts that might prevent a republican from winning an election?

5. Should Rafael Palmiero be elected to the hall of fame?

6. Does Justice Ginsburg wear split-crotch panties?

7. Do you have the Ten Commandments tattooed on your ass?

8. Does the 2nd amendment allow me to own an anti-tank gun (keep in mind that my .45-70 Contender isn't really considered an anti-tank gun)?

9. Who has a bigger penis, Justice Souter or Justice Thomas (Think about that one. The answer might not be so obvious)?

10. Do you think there is a right to privacy even if it isn't enumerated in the constitution (see amendment #9), or do you believe the government can pretty much stick its nose into anyone's business for whatever damned reason it pleases?

11. If a big scary negro raped your wife and she got pregnant from it, would you want her to have an abortion?

12. Would you duct tape your asshole shut if you were ever in a room alone with Justice Souter?

13. If your prostate was the size of a musk melon and the only thing that would relieve your nausea from the cancer treatments was doing bong hits while listening to Piper At The Gates Of Dawn, would you legalize the medicinal use of marijuana?

14. Would you overturn Hulk Hogan v. Andre The Giant?

15. Is “Antonin Scalia” the sound it makes when Anna Nicole-Smith takes her bra off?