Friday, October 23, 2009

7 & 7 Is

In what is sure to inspire incontinence the world over, elephantine software titan Microsoft put it's latest operating system on sale to the general public today. Good thing I was able to locate my trusty butt plug in time. Since I am an IT fag, I will let you in on a few observations concerning Windows 7.

It is not a complete godawful cluster fucking mess like Visa was. Remember the blog I wrote about Vista when it first came out? I don't either but I'm sure it was hilarious, informative and poignant. The point is that the best thing W7 has going for it is that it is not Vista. Neither is cat shit but I wouldn't necessarily trust it to run my computer.

With W7, like Vista, you have to have a computer with serious bullocks in order to run half way decently when burdened by it. Unless you really enjoy staring into space for long periods of time while your hapless computer spins its wheels. Remember, less systems resources equals more time to fire one off so it might not be all that bad!

UAC – User account control. It’s the pain in the ass pop-up window that pops up anytime you do anything thing even remotely considered potentially harmful if done by a nefarious process. So it pops up more often than my dick would at a Victoria Secrets convention. Speaking of which, too bad humans don’t have a UAC that warns them when they are about to engage in possibly harmful activities. Like having sex without a rubber thingy on their John-Thomas. W7 has a slider control that can control the sensitivity of the UAC unlike Vista. I think it ranges from “annoying” to “complete pain in the balls.” I would just turn the fucker off completely. 

Windows 7 has some other bells and whistles but since most people I know just use their computers for email and porn surfing, I won’t comment on them. Of course since I work in a business environment I will have to delve into W7 in great detail and find out why it doesn’t work with any of our applications. I’m looking forward to that as I would to having my scrotum set ablaze.

My advice? Get a 2nd mortgage and put your sheckles down on a Mac. Hot chicks did Macs.


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