Thursday, June 30, 2005

"The Sound Activated Shit Auger...if you build it...they will scream!"

The Sound Activated Shit Auger (as pictured at the Sandwich fair) can liven up any party or social gathering!

Simply bind a "friend" in the chair and insert his/her head in the fish bowl receiver.

Have one of your lactose intolerant friends mount the comfy thunder pot transceiver. Have your friend "download".

When your bound friend realizes what he/she is about to experience, they will shout out in excitement/anguish/panic/euphoria. This shout will be picked up by a concealed microphone that activates the auger. The more they shout, the faster the auger turns!

- Little Dougie Pork Sword

I understand that LDPS is in negotiations with Dean Kamen who is interested in manufacturing these. - WGB


At 10:18 AM, Blogger LittleDougyPorkSword said...

I really need volunteers for testing. Also, coporate sponsorship would be good, Imodium?

Also constructing a "face shot" simulator. Don't know what for.

At 1:57 PM, Blogger Erin Nicole said...

the picture could be a rush or queensryche album cover.

At 8:36 PM, Blogger The Cod God said...

Hey, LittleDougyTofu-pupToothpick....

You may be onto something. I know (don't ask me how) that Captain Leech would pay for someone to do that to him. Preferably a fat grandmother.

Start counting your money.


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