Monday, February 08, 2010

Praying For A Peyton-On-Palin Tea-Bagging

I must say, dear ravenous consumers of this blog, that my Super Bowl predictions were spectacularly spot-on as usual. The only mistake I made was not putting any money on the game. I feel sorry for the loosing QB Peyton Manning’s teammates, though. I’m sure they each got a hardy post game tea-bagging from him in the locker-room. He looked pissed. Ha!

Speaking of tea-bagging, those morons in the so-called Tea Party “grass roots” movement met in Nashville the other day. Their keynote speaker, who was a cool $100k richer afterwards, was none other than Sarah “Barracuda” Palin. The skirt wearing scatterbrain was trotting out standard neoconservative fare in her cutesy, homespun, nauseating way and didn’t seem to really address the concerns of your average motley Tea-Bagger. And, along with sexy black stockings, she was wearing the flag of a foreign country on her lapel! Jesus god, what if a Democrat did that? Here is a great take on it by Salon’s Glenn Greenwald .

The bug fucking-est insane thing that left Sarah's lucious red lips during a post Tea-Bag convention puff ball interview with her employer Fox “News” was about playing the “war card.” She thinks the only way Obama can win the next election is if he decided to “declare war on Iran or decided to really come out and do whatever he could do to support Israel -- which I'd like him to do”. In other words, take a page from the Republican playbook. I hope Obama wasn’t listening.

It amazes the fuck out of me that these Baggers don’t realize they are being totally duped by the big corporate interests in America. Like that bone head “Joe the Plumber” who thought he would make out better under the McCain/Palin tax plan than Obama’s. He was of course wrong. And I would bet that 90% of the Tea-Bag movement couldn’t tell you what socialism is but still love to attack Obama with the epithet. And most of these dunces don’t realize that Medicare is a government program!

These fools sit around and listen to the Fox/Limbaugh/Beck/Hannity bullshit and believe it without question! My god, I listen to that crap on the way to work and its incredible! According to them, its Republicans who are out there for the little guy not the evil, treasonous Democrats. And people believe it!

I hope that Peyton Manning finds Sarah Palin and gives her a good old tea-baggin. She deserves it.

Tuesday, February 02, 2010

Thermophile's Lament

Sometimes I just want to get this life over with and head on over to the next one. Couldn’t be worse.

Last Friday was colder than a well digger’s ass and windy as hell. Nonetheless I was looking forward to going out to dinner with my pal Clark. However, when I got home from work, I noticed I had no water. The fucking pipes had frozen again!

My swank bachelor pad at scenic Rye Harbor is right on the water so it’s built sitting above ground. The bottom is covered with this sort of half-assed plywood skirt. When it’s windy, the cold whips under the house and not only freezes the pipes but makes the heat run 100% of the time just to keep things at a balmy 55 degrees. Shit, I blew through over a hundred gallons of oil last month and electricity is running at over $120 a month!

The place does have a crappy, inefficient wood stove but wood ain’t cheap either. All in all, not a great place for a heat lover like Wheel Gun Bob.

Clark came over with take-out dinner and helped me thaw most of the pipes. And despite the bathroom faucet's refusal to yield to our demands, the night turned out to be fun.

I decided I would have to drop a cool Benjamin on a ¼ cord of seasoned hard wood to feed the shitty wood stove. Then maybe I would at least have a chance of making it through the winter. I went and did just that the next morning and had a hot chick assist me with the unloading of my hard wood (whatever what you may think, I mean this literally).

Once inside my walk-in freezer/bungalow I noticed that even though the heat was cranked, it was only 50 degrees! It was nipple erecting cold I noticed. I tried to re-light the furnace but no go. While the hot chick kindly lit a fire (in the stove that is), I called the land lord, Ed.

Ed, who is shaped like an immense Christmas ornament, came over with his son and after two or three hours got the oil uncongealed and the heat running.

Jesus, can’t wait for spring.