Thursday, October 20, 2011

Hey Moe!

I’m going to miss Muammar Qaddafi if reports of his demise are true. Yes, Moʼammar Gadhafi apparently had his head ventilated or was blown up or something violent was done to him with extreme prejudice that caused him to leave this mortal coil. Too bad because ole Muammar Kaddafi was an entertaining, if bloodthirsty, ruthless dictator. Moammar El Kadhafi was responsible for many deaths and almost as many names but nonetheless had a certain charisma. Muʼammar al-Qadafi always looked comical to me and I can see him cracking people up as he cracked heads.

Muʻammar na a Qadhdhāfī was responsible for blowing up a plane over Scotland killing many people and no doubt lots of sheep. But we forgave Muammar Ghaddafy with G.W. Bush at the helm probably due to the fact Muhammar Gandolphini had oil. And yes, Muammar gandalf vs Dumbledore had a lot of oil! That’s the only reason that Mouammar Garciapara stayed around so long as he did.

Rest In Hell Mo’ammar El S’zyslak.

Tuesday, October 18, 2011

Almost time to get out the guillotines

I may not be a true economist per say, but anyone with half a brain can see that Herman Cain’s 9-9-9 tax plan is sheer stupidity. And guess who will end up paying more taxes and who will end up paying less? Its seems whenever an extremely rich person proposes changing the tax code we get fucked. I’m sure Millionaire Mitt’s tax plan will do the same. And these tax plans appeal to the vacuous masses because they are “simple.” Just because something is simple doesn’t necessarily make it good. A 2 x 4 piece of wood is very simple indeed but would you want it shoved up your ass?

My god are the rich getting away with it these days! And when you dare call them on their regressive bullshit they wail like diaper rash ravaged babies and scream “class warfare!” Damn right it’s class warfare; only it’s the rich trying to get richer by shitting all over the rest of us. You hear all these scary stats like the richest 1% of the country own 40% of the wealth and how that’s been increasing over the years. Some really greedy mofos out there.

The truly sad part is how the Greedpublicans are roiling the masses using the Tea Party. They have their tea-bagger minions out there spouting their crap about how the liberals want to destroy the country, how god will punish us for gay marriage, etc. while the rich calmly pick their pockets clean. Perhaps one of these days a tea-bagger will turn around and see a 2 x 4 protruding ruefully out of his ass and actually realize he’s been fucked.

Wednesday, October 12, 2011

Phishing for Greedpublicans

Haven’t heard from me in a while, have you? What I was doing was punishing you guys for not reading my blogs by not blogging. So there! I hope you have learned a valuable lesson. I am willing to put this episode behind us so I will now fashion a jaunty little blog out of the bits and bytes.

Much to talk about actually. Let’s start with those dirty, smelly hippies trying to harsh Wall Street’s buzz. I say hire Phish to play a free concert nearby and when the hippies gravitate towards it like moths to a light bulb, lay patchouli activated AHMs (anti-hippie mines) and build a fence around Wall Street. After all, we don’t want all those poor millionaires distracted by all the chanting and drum circles while they are busy trying to screw the rest of us.

Speaking of greed, the lineup of Republican (to be known henceforth as “Greedpublican”) candidates is as entertaining as ever despite the lack of The Wild Woman of Wasilla. Herman Cain in particular is a riot, Rick Perry is a dumb version of George Bush (wow, trying to wrap my mind around what I just said), Michele Bachman is some freakish Stepford wife, Ron Paul is Ayn Rand in drag, and Romney is, well, whatever you want him to be. Despite my extreme displeasure with the current occupant of the White House, I could never vote for any of these jokers.

Stay tuned and come back often or prepare to be punished again.