Thursday, March 30, 2006

My Fucking Week

I can't wait until midnight tomorrow. That's when I get the hell out of work and this damned week finally comes to a merciful end. I've been taking a class in the mornings and working nights. I almost got fired this week not long after I almost quit. And my damned knee went south again so I've been in a lot of pain. I'm at wit's end. So I have to make this weekend count, goddamnit!

Saturday night my band Jupiter 2 plays at The Blue Mermaid in Portsmouth. We are playing with the Electric Caves who have been around since the early 80's (1980s not 1880s although I could be wrong). Finally, we have found a band older than we are. Bring your impacted bowels, swollen prostates, false teeth and Viagra to the show and have a blast. We will have you home in time for your Geritol enema and Lawrence Welk re-runs. And if you do make it, please buy me drinks.

Wednesday, March 15, 2006


I'm on strike. Fuck this shit. I had the occasion to talk to one of our applications guys tonight. It concerned a problem with one of our shitty, buggy apps. Well, he talked backed to be like I was his little bitch. I came so close to loosing it on the phone with him it's not funny. My entire body turned red with rage (except my pecker, which retained its usual chartreuse color). I actually had to think of something else while he was crapping on me so I wouldn't blurt out some career ending, profanity laced diatribe. I'm still steamed. The guy's a condescending prick of the highest order. I must endeavor to avoid all communication with him in the future even if it means possibly fucking something up.

The last month here in IT land has really sucked silicon cock. It's been busy as shit. Some nights I don't even have time for dinner much less (and far more importantly) time to entertain/enlighten you fuckers with a well crafted blog. Well I'm on strike tonight so here I go -

I went to the doctors today since I haven't felt good for about a month (hmmm). Seems I have strep like all my roommates. Anyway, I was reading the Sports Illustrated article about Barry Bonds whilst waiting for a nurse to swab my throat (or maybe I was supposed to swab hers). What a tool that guy is. He gained 15lbs in muscle in just 100 days using steroids. Then he started taking all sorts of growth hormones, horse steroids, testosterone, etc. just so he could hit longer homeruns than fellow 'roid abuser Mark McGuire. I wonder if anyone noticed when Bonds started showing up in the club house with a jockey on his back. Man, his junk must be so small now that he has to borrow his jock straps from a lightly hung pygmy marmoset.

Speaking of very small balls, our commander in chief is in serious trouble these days. The American public, as dumb as they are, are finally catching onto him. Yes people, he is phenomenally inept as I have been saying all along. I thought it was obvious from the get go. But that's just me. It's high time the Republicans start throwing up their usual smoke screens like gay marriage, prayer in school, flag burning and the other lame shit to distract the easily distracted public. I know I won't fall for it.

In case anyone gives a rat's vagina, there will apparently be a Jupiter 2 show April 1st at the Blue Mermaid in Portsmouth. At least that's what I'm told. We are a bunch of fools, after all.

Well, my strike lasted all of 15 min. I've got to get back to the grind.